This is not about fault, or blame; just facts, with only essential explanation

My main goal is goal is understanding and realization of what is feasible for human beings

So…

I want once a month phone calls and minimal deferment; this is essential to my goals,

The issue is the negative effect of some of our interactions on me—on my mood, goals, and health (stress: bp). It has been going on for years, I have brought it up before—not just recently, tried internal adjustment, but without resolution.

It became severe a week before my trip to Weaverville. I decided I will not be exposed anymore. I decided I must act. I am going to be firm; flexibility may come later

Therefore, initially

If you continue to give advice or if you are openly and negatively judgmental about me, I will not talk to you till reassured that it will stop

I do want you to visit, but am reserving 2022 for travel, exploration, immersion in nature, and goals

I will continue to work on internal resolution,

If you are interested in reasons how judgment and advice may be destructive, read the first two chapters of People Skills by Robert Bolton.

You may note that while it is not a reason for you, I am consistent in that I avoid anything in your personal life that you have asked me to not discuss.

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Conversation

All this may seem absurd to me as it does sometimes to me too, but given the severity of the issue I must go through with it

If you want to lay conditions on this, sure, I anticipate the possibility; but I will decide what conditions I set and how to implement them (based on information available to me)

Trivially obvious or absurd so benefit is zero vs huge cost.

Judgment without sufficient information; harsh in past; recently at many birthdays and Christmases; advice presumes judgment; and all the advice you have given is trivially obvious and negativistic or, less commonly, absurd

I know this may be difficult for you because of a tendency to blurt out things (and sometimes attempt to cover up later)

Angela Merkel, Stephanie Holliday, Vicki, Mohan Ram, Kamala Harris, Joe Biden